A Childhood Cancer Survivor Poem
© 2016 Christine Mulvihill
My spine tingles and my bones grow weak
I get the chills from every creak
Even the faintest noise makes my heart jump
Faster and faster my heart does pump.
The feeling I speak about is the feeling of fear
It makes reality become quite unclear
They say the only thing to fear is fear itself
But I swear that doll jumped off the shelf.
I have the feeling I’m no longer alone
From the basement I hear a dreadful moan,
Quite unsettling this feeling can be
When I feel there’s someone watching over me.
Mysterious like a shot in the dark
Stabs a knife right through the heart
Once you find it run quick turn on the light
While you and your conscious put up a fight.
Trying to figure out what’s real and what’s imagination
My heart’s constant pounding won’t help my frustration
As noises come closer I don’t linger
But my body freezes from my toes to my fingers,
Frozen still yet ready to run
Tears fall slowly like the setting sun.
I fall to the floor and pray that it’s all a dream
No sooner I finish than I echo a scream
The room races round and round
So dizzy I can’t find the ground
Its’ gotten into my mind and now I’m out of control
It haunts my thoughts and my soul.
Could this be it, could it be the end
Is my demise just around the bend?
Then the garage opens and the car drives in
A relived breath utters, “Fear had me again”.